Caught off guard

Dear Ashlee Simpson:

Even though I found myself watching repeats of your show when my baby was first born, I find you annoying. So, I didn’t feel too sorry for you when you got caught lip-synching on Saturday Night Live. I saw a tiny clip of it and saw how you tried to act all “cool” by kicking and dancing but really, you are the type of wannabe that poses as being bad ass.

Do you remember the old phrase “poser?” That’s you.

So, for future reference, if you are, in fact, a lip-syncher, it might not be a good idea to say this in an interview:

“I’m totally against it and offended by it,” Simpson told Lucky magazine. “I’m going out to let my real talent show, not to just stand there and dance around. Personally, I’d never lip-synch. It’s just not me.”

Now, if you don’t mind, I’m gonna go find a clip of it on the internet.

Yours truly,
The Sarcastic Journalist

PS, that hair color of yours looks HORRIBLE. And I totally can tell that you and your sister had nose jobs. Wanna fess up about that as well?

14 Responses to “Caught off guard”

  1. Jessica
    October 25th, 2004 18:26

    Haven’t yet viewed it, but this article has a link to the video. :-D


  2. Robotnik
    October 25th, 2004 18:32

    Who the feck is Ashlee Simpson? I saw it live on SNL and had no idea who she was.

    Jude Law was great though.

  3. Corrie
    October 25th, 2004 20:36

    I about died laughing about Ashlee Simpson. I was so sorry about falling asleep and missing that! She is a total freak dancer and her nose job is really bad.


  4. Sarcomical
    October 25th, 2004 20:46

    omg, we saw it and laughed our asses off.

    not to be mean, but come on. and then to play it off like “my band started playing the wrong song, so i didn’t know what to do” giggle. after walking completely off-stage right before that because your voice track started playing through the speakers (plus it was the song you did right before that) and you were embarrassed as hell because girl you totally just got caught with your drawers down.

    goof stuff.

  5. Sarcomical
    October 25th, 2004 20:47

    oops. good.

    good stuff.

  6. Robotnik
    October 26th, 2004 09:38

    On the other hand…was that really such a shock? Any half-ass musician can figure out that she is lip-synching to a TRACK. If you’ve heard the song once, and you see it “live” you can figure out that the vocals are engineered and mixed for CD.

    This is a generation of no-talent, magazine-cover girls. There are only a few girls/women who can really sing–and you won’t see them making any kind of money. They’ll be the ones in the smoky, little clubs barely pulling $50 a night.

    Pop music sucks.

  7. Louise
    October 26th, 2004 11:13

    You mean she’s already had a nose job? She should sue her doctor.

  8. Antonia
    October 26th, 2004 13:29

    I just watched the video on MSN. She is such an idiot. How are these the artists that this country is fattening with their hard-earned dollars? What happened to integrity, originality, and intelligence? Why ARE the good artists always the starving ones? Totally with you on this, Robotnik. The entire situation is so foul that mentioning it is basically stating the obvious, and yet so few people see it that the crap musical puppets continue to get richer.

  9. Pink Lotus
    October 26th, 2004 15:21

    I’m tired of these hacks calling themselves “artists.” Whitney Houston may be a crackhead, but at least she has talent.

  10. Louise
    October 26th, 2004 17:59

    I just watched Access Hollywood– Ashlee says that her voice was bad that day, because she has acid reflux. So “for the first time ever in her life” she agreed to use a backing track– and is never ever gonna do it again, and blah blah blah.

    And I can’t believe I’ve commented twice on Ashlee Simpson!

  11. Robotnik
    October 26th, 2004 18:38

    Hey, during her interview w/Carson “Frankenstein Chin” Daly, she said she had Acid RefLEX.
    Feckin’ Edjits…all of them.

  12. Antonia
    October 26th, 2004 19:21

    So why did she lie and blame her band at the end of SNL? If I was one of them I would quit on the spot. She obviously thinks she’s better than them and can use them as her own personal scapegoat. She tried to make them look bad to save her own dumb ass.

  13. Robotnik
    October 27th, 2004 16:00

    Antonia, technically she was right. The drummer triggered the wrong track. If you watch closely, when the vocals come in…EVERYONE in the band looks back at the drummer.

  14. Bubby
    October 28th, 2004 14:29

    It would actually surprise me that anyone in the last 10 years wasn’t lip-synching on SNL. I don’t watch it anymore.

    I have acid reflux and it’s never affected my voice.

    Excuses… excuses…

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