You’re invited to my pity party

How to have a really crappy 3 months:

Get knocked up. Wake up every morning feeling overly nausious. On the mornings (by an act of God) you don’t feel like puking your brains out, be too tired to do any form of celebrating. Start to hate breakfast because you can’t fathom eating anything this early in the morning. Start to hate all foods (including home-brewed coffee) because they make you want to puke. Go to work. Hold back puking feelings for 8 hours because you don’t do that type of thing in a public toilet. Give in and go get the peppermint mocha from starbucks for $3.50 or whatever because its the only thing that makes you feel better for a short period of time. Agonize about how you’re becoming one of those “Starbucks people’ who spend waaay too much money there. Never get nooky (the exact thing that got you into this predicament) because well, puking on the hubby isn’t exactly considered good forplay. Slowly begin to hate people who didn’t have any form of morning sickness. Wonder if this means I’m having twins. Remember that twins run in the family and that you are, in fact, a twin. Breathe sigh of relief for being identical. Consider going back to Starbucks and giving up all food. Wonder if its just your distended bowels (that’s what the book says) or if your weird food habits are catching up to you that makes the pants feel a little snug. Barf. Repeat process.

One Response to “You’re invited to my pity party”

  1. Texas T-Bone
    November 18th, 2003 11:43

    Anything worth doing involves some struggle. The momentary discomfort will be more than worth it the first time you see your little guy or girl. And it keeps getting better.

    Focus on the bad and the bad will be your focus.

  • Etc.

    • www.flickr.com