Ass kickings, part 1,349

I’m trying to be positive and fight this whole nagging sadness that sometimes overwhelmes me. I have an appointment with my crazy doctor tomorrow to go over some of the “issues” that I have.

I’m starting to think that I need meds for this, however. I’ve had troubles falling asleep, I’ve had moments where I’m just sitting here and the sadness hits and I know the funk is coming on. I’m trying to fight it and not let it overcome me like it has in the past.

One way I’m doing it is by going on a walk. It is FINALLY fall-like weather here, according to the weather channel it is 77 degrees Farenheit. For some of you, I’m sure that’s like mid-summer weather, meaning you should be pulling out the bathing suit and hitting the beach.

Here in Houston? Damn, it’s NICE. I’m wearing my new blue jeans as much as humanly possible.

So we went walking today and I took some pics.

Ellie likes her green stroller. I like walking it next to the water. Right after I took this some ducks came a’runnin. I hate birds.

Anyway, I’m not sure about how to go get my meds but I think I might need some. I don’t like having the funk. I don’t like feeling sad and tired and mad and ready to kick ass.

So don’t mess with me. I could definately kick some ass right about now.

17 Responses to “Ass kickings, part 1,349”

  1. priscilla
    October 12th, 2004 15:13

    Hopefully the crazy doctor can help you out with some meds. I, too, did NOT want to take meds and told myself that I could control my feelings….I couldn’t and got to the point that I was contemplating suicide so please don’t allow yourself to get to that point. Meds can be a good thing. I feel better now and I realize that I really needed to get on the meds back when I thought I could control the funk!

  2. Ali
    October 12th, 2004 15:38

    Hey, I thought I could get over it all by myself, that’s why I waited 13 months to talk to my ob/gyn about it. It just got so bad that I had to do something.
    Now my husband is happier because I’m happier. He says I’m like the old me and he likes that. I like it too.

  3. Cindy
    October 12th, 2004 16:29

    Hang in there. I know feeling “funk” can be sooo heavy.
    BTW, I hate birds too.

  4. A Different Angie
    October 12th, 2004 16:52

    My sister was going through the same thing. Let me know if you want her email - she just seems more “even” now that she’s on them. She’s a good time :)

  5. yvonne
    October 12th, 2004 17:38

    I think that’s good that you’re WILLING to take medication if you need it, but can I just tell you how good it is that you’re going for walks. Medication will help, but it’s not the cure, getting out of the house is great. Trust me, I know, I’ve been there.
    Good luck, and email me if you ever want to talk. Hell, call me if you want, I’llsend you my number.

  6. Caryn
    October 12th, 2004 17:48

    It was so comforting to me to read about other mothers who were going through the same thing that I was. It made me feel less looney. My little girl is 8 months now, and I feel more like myself than ever. I hope you can find something to help, I know it’s rough.

  7. Robotnik
    October 12th, 2004 18:32

    I once found myself with a butcher knife at my throat, at 3 am.
    Another time I was going to stick my head inside the oven.

    I never got on medication; what pulled me out of THOSE holes were Bukowski and Fante.

    Of course, you may be talking about hormonal changes, whereas my depression was situational.

    Sorry, not much help w/this, but I’m pulling for your and sending good thoughs.

  8. Jen
    October 12th, 2004 20:41

    I’m (not so patiently) waiting for my appointment. It’s not until the 19th. It’s so good that you’re getting help and kudos to you for not waiting for two more kids and 4 years to pass by like I have.

  9. Wendy
    October 13th, 2004 00:45

    I really admire you for standing up and doing something about it. PPD can take over your life (yep, BTDT) and I only wish I had taken care of things much earlier.

  10. CUrly Girl
    October 13th, 2004 08:48

    it’s ok dud, hang in there. and look at that beautiful ellie you made. you kick ass dud, dont forget that!

  11. PinkStiletto
    October 13th, 2004 09:56

    I love the crazy doctor. Seriously, I love trips to the crazy doctor because inevitably, she illeviates some of the crazy for me. Or, rather, she helps me wade through some of it.

    The meds… also good.

  12. perl
    October 13th, 2004 13:52

    sorry to hear you’re still experiencing serious funk. can your mom score you something (try zoloft 25mg go up to 50 in a few days - good for breastfeeding!)? or maybe your ob office could call something in without making an appt if it’s going to be a long wait…. let us know how you’re doing. i just pushed myself up to 100mg of zoloft so i don’t lose my shit when this baby’s born (any day now!). so far so good- my shit is still intact, as far as i can tell.

  13. Robotnik
    October 13th, 2004 13:55

    Ya…hang in there DUD!

  14. Jen
    October 14th, 2004 07:22

    I reccomend Effexor XR. All the things you listed sound exactly like the way I felt. I have been taking Effexor since July and it has made a world of difference and I’m only on the low 75mg dosage. Good luck girlie

  15. martha
    October 14th, 2004 07:34

    My depression isn’t baby-induced but after about ten years of trying to fight it intermittently with just therapy I decided I’d give meds a try and they’ve changed my life, honestly - not that I don’t ever feel sad anymore, it’s just not that all-encompassing sadness. I hope your doctor is nice and understanding about it and helps you figure out what the right meds are.

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