Journalists Gone Wild

I remember, after September 11 (2001, in case you were thinking I spoke of Sept. 11. 2000 or 2002) that all the news organizations were on “high alert.” If there was a fire downtown? You bet your bottom dollar that the “Talking Heads” would be there, asking the important questions.

“Did you see anyone that might be a Muslim?”
“Well, do you think that this is something a terrorist might do?”
“Okay, fine. Did you see anyone that looked somewhat suspicious…you know, carrying knives or something?”

I’ve never been that fond of TV news, even though once I happened to be in the right place in the right time and got interviewed for a story. Me! Interviewed! On the news! Ha! I said things! And I don’t think they made much sense! Just like I did AGAIN for the incrediably cute Sarah in Australia. (Thank you Sarah, I appreciate you thinking of me.)

I’m much more likely to read my news either in the paper or online. That way, I can read what I want and get on with my life. If I’m watching the TV news, I have to sit through 30 awkward minutes while the people try not to have dead air space.

All week long, I kept hoping that the Talking Heads would disappear and Survivor would come on so I could watch some pansy boys faint in the jungle. But, of course, that didn’t happen. Eventually, I gave up on the local TV news, hoping that I’d have electricity after the storm to get back down to business.

Once we woke up Saturday morning and realized that none of our cars had blown away, we turned on the TV while my Mom made us a Hurricane Breakfast of oatmeal, toast and coffee. Honestly, I felt sorry for the Talking Heads that were out in the field; I know they are just doing their jobs and that they hope to eventually become anchor.

Come on, I know I’m not the only Houstonian that sees Tricia Takanawa and thinks of Shern-Min Chow before she made the jump to the desk. (Shern-Min was Houston’s resident Asian stuck in every bad storm for years.)

As you most likely know by now, Pansy Old Rita bypassed Houston and headed east. (Still haven’t heard on my family’s homes in Beaumont and Port Arthur, which the BBC described as a poor town full of Vietnamese fishermen.) Good for Houston, bad for the news people. What are they supposed to do with all that time on the air?

Have no fear, the journalists WILL find something to report on. “Do not, I repeat! Do not go outside!” they scream as the storm has gone well past us. “You will not find gas anywhere! We will not tell you where to get gas because you can’t leave the house!”

The good radio people, on the other hand, were more than willing to share the location of the gas stations with gas. “Get the gas! Loot! Shoot people!”

Shoot people? Woo hoo! I’ve been a’waitin to use my shotgun since I got back to Texas.

What I loved the most of the Houston aftermath was the fact that the newspeople HAD to find some destruction. Since the storm mostly missed Houston, they had to look pretty hard.

“Here is a tree. The tree is down. Just another sad, sad victim of Hurricane Rita.”

17 Responses to “Journalists Gone Wild”

  1. Stefanie
    September 25th, 2005 23:29

    Well I’m just glad there was not much drama. We’re all happy you’re safe and sound. Sorry, but we are.

  2. Steph.
    September 26th, 2005 00:34

    Hey, we lost a tree to Rita. Think they’ll come and interview me? Sher-min, Sher-min…I want Sher-min! If not, I’m calling Marvin…(grin)

  3. Jack's Raging Mommy
    September 26th, 2005 00:36

    A while back in Omaha, I actually called the TV station to complain that they preempted the TV for weather all night. It wasn’t even a tornado, dammit!

  4. kim
    September 26th, 2005 01:22

    ‘Anticlimactic’ is a good thing in this case.

  5. paige
    September 26th, 2005 04:33

    We get FOX news for three or four hours a day here on the little Army news channel, and it’s hilarious. Just this morning I was watching Geraldo ask some 80 y/o woman what she did during the storm.

    “Oh, I played peanuckle, I finished a book and wrote some thank you cards.”
    “Weren’t you TERRIFIED??”
    “Well, no sir.”
    “I can’t imagine how TERRIFYING this must have been for you!”

    So hilarious.

  6. AMP
    September 26th, 2005 05:40

    that’s why i got out of the biz after 8 years of bullshit.

  7. AMP
    September 26th, 2005 05:41

    p.s. I recall you were once part of the ‘elitist liberal’ media. yes? YES?

  8. Em
    September 26th, 2005 09:08

    Ours is called Shelby Scott. She is white, old and retired. I don’t think she ever did make it to the desk but whenever there is a blizzard or a hurricane, they drag old Shelby out of the basement, dust her off and stick her out in it. I feel bad for Shelby.

  9. warcrygirl
    September 26th, 2005 09:25

    Glad you got through the storm unscathed. Just my luck though, the seller of the eBay auction I just won lives in Houston and told me they stopped delivering the mail the Wednesday before the storm him. Now he’s wanting to know where the hell his money order is.

    Watching Geraldo makes me break out in hives…

  10. warcrygirl
    September 26th, 2005 09:25

    I meant the Wednesday before the storm HIT. Gah, I can’t type today.

  11. clickmom
    September 26th, 2005 12:42

    I am a photographer for a weekly newspaper and have also been reduced to driving around after a storm in search of downed trees or flooded intersections. It’s a living. barely

  12. ben
    September 26th, 2005 12:44

    It didn’t even rain here (we’re west and way inland of Houston) but we didnt’ get any mail delivery Friday or Saturday and all of our schools closed on Friday “just in case.”

    I do love all the video footage they show along with the “authorities are begging folks not to go home yet - it’s not safe” Most of it is a tree limb in the street with all the cars zipping around it. How horrible! Meanwhile people from the ninth ward saw their homes flooded. Again.

  13. sarah
    September 26th, 2005 16:39

    Shern-Min is EXACTLY who I think of when I see Tricia Takanawa on Family Guy! : )

  14. Ctal
    September 26th, 2005 17:38

    HA! During the storm when those pantywaists were holed up in a parking lot across the seawall in the wind, I was a madwoman! “HA,” I would scream at the reporter on television, “You’re no SHERN MIN CHOW! You wanna impress me??? Get over there 5 feet from the seawall and try to stand up….wuss!” Then my family would medicate me and I’d be ok for a while.
    And I’d like to apologize for tying up KPRCs phone lines during every “Ask Frank” segment. I wanted to see if he had a good borscht recipe he could share. It would have made for better TV than random idiots calling in and asking Frank if they’d be ok. Call Miss Cleo, you idiots.

  15. Amy
    September 26th, 2005 20:11

    Much like the weather people act in L.A., ALL THE TIME. “Let’s go to Dallas in Hollywood, where there were reports of rain today! “Yes, as you can see, there has been rain falling for a few hours today.”Camera pans to puddle on the sidewalk.
    Yes, that is the weather coverage in L.A.

  16. Niki
    September 27th, 2005 00:17

    Okay - So as you mentioned, we missed the pansy boys of Survivor. Are you going to get a replay of the preempted show. Channel 2 is doing it - Channel 11 should. Any news

  17. MunchkinMama
    September 27th, 2005 10:18

    Early morning brain-fart: when you said “Talking Heads”, I thought you were meaning the band, especially in corrolation to the fire (their song “Burning Down the House”) - very confused as to why they were in Houston and ordering you around . . . but soon it became clear: I should not read blogs when I have not finish breakfast - low blood sugar levels do not allow for responsible reading. :)

    By the by, I’m glad your Talking Heads don’t have much to talk about because that means you’re safe (or safer, especially with that shot gun).

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