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Logic

I guess it isn’t too much to say that most 14-month-olds are crazy. I mean, hello, my kid poops her pants, likes to stick her face in smelly shoes and eat paper.

She has gotten much better about waking up in the night since we removed milk from her diet. She woke up at about 6:30am and as you may know, waking up during “Morning Dark” is a Big NoNo in the SJ household. I brought her to bed with us, hoping she’d go to sleep but figuring that was it, we were in for a long day of 24-hour news.

She drank her bottle, only occassionally molesting my skin with its coldness. I let her take all the middle of the bed and me and my gut positioned ourselves on the corner with what I call my “crotch pillow.” (It is the pillow I place between my legs. I have a feeling it smells like crotch.)

She has a huge section of the bed to herself. But, no. She’s not happy. She has to lay on me. She plants her face into my armpit. She climbs upon my chest and wiggles into the space below my chin like a puppy dog. She rolls over and flops and makes noises constantly.

She starts pointing at the fan. Starts giving me kisses. “Oh no,” I think. “This is it. We’re getting up.”

We’re laying there, and it seems as if she has finally settled down somewhat. Sure, she was laying on my belly, but she was being quiet. All of a sudden, she jumps up, looks at The Sleeping Hubs and yells “Boo!”

Who wants to play the “Boo!” game when it is still dark outside? Do you not see that we’re trying to ignore you and all your cuteness?

Yes, boo indeed. You just won your little butt a trip back to your crib with a consolation prize of a bottle of soy milk. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Maybe if you are lucky, the Boogie Man will come and keep you company.

Then tell me how much you like people yelling “Boo” while you sleep.

14 Responses to “Logic”

  1. Chika
    September 23rd, 2005 11:32
    1

    Nothing like a baby yellin’ BOO while you try to sleep to take your mind off the yuckier things in life. Three Cheers for Ms. E!!!

  2. Mir
    September 23rd, 2005 11:51
    2

    Here’s hoping she takes an extra-long nap later to compensate. And that when she said BOO, Rita was so stunned, she veered off course.

  3. Beth
    September 23rd, 2005 12:14
    3

    LOL..that story cracked me up, thanks for sharing!!

  4. Eulallia
    September 23rd, 2005 12:40
    4

    My little E– has a mental check-list that she has to go over any time I’m laying down. She has to make sure I’m intact, or something. Mommy’s eyeballs? (poke, poke) Check. Nose? (squeeze, twist) Check. Boogers? (shove, wiggle) Double Check. Deflated boobs? (grab, squeeze) ….. Boobs? (smack, jab) ….. Boobs? (lift up shirt, oh there they are) Check.

  5. Nan
    September 23rd, 2005 14:25
    5

    HAHAHA, aren’t kids wonderful!

  6. carol
    September 23rd, 2005 14:27
    6

    I’m thinking of you during this scary time - hope you stay safe and enjoy your cookies and Sex in the City…gotta stay calm for Ellie and the baby.

  7. Jenn
    September 23rd, 2005 14:28
    7

    Don’t you miss the newborn days, just a little, at times like this? Even though there was a lot of postpartum weeping, THEY STILL FELL ASLEEP ON ME AND STAYED ASLEEP. Bliss.

  8. Debbie
    September 23rd, 2005 14:47
    8

    Good luck to you and yours. The clouds are moving in and the winds picking up. We have boarded up and filled every water container. Getting ready to ride this puppy out.

    The kids are dreading the power going out more than anything else–no t.v.! no video games!

  9. clickmom
    September 23rd, 2005 15:02
    9

    My thoughts are with you during this worrisome time.

    One day when you are dragiing E out of bed, yelling at the her to get dressed for school, you’ll look back on the toddler days with longing.

  10. MollieBee
    September 23rd, 2005 15:21
    10

    Ya. I can’t even stand my cat fucking with me when I’m trying to sleep, no way am I gonna let a 3.5 yr old do it.

    Boo!

  11. Tiffany
    September 23rd, 2005 20:08
    11

    Next time, stick her in front of the T.V. and turn the channel to the 700 Club.
    Enjoy your sedative, kiddo!

  12. Vanessa_AR
    September 23rd, 2005 20:24
    12

    Here you are facing such a stressful time and still managing to crack us all up. WE should be doing something for you right now. My thoughts are with you and your entire family. Stay safe, okay?

  13. chris
    September 24th, 2005 08:14
    13

    BOO, indeed! nothing like a baby girl to take your mind off the approach of a hurricane, eh? 14 months old is one of my favorite kid ages though- the ride back and forth between cute and incorrigible takes your breath away! stay safe!

  14. coolbeans
    September 24th, 2005 10:34
    14

    The Toddler says “boo” to me every time he climbs in bed with us. But he doesn’t say “BOO!”. He says, “Boooooooo” in a low growl while trying to access the BOOBS.

    I’d rather play peek-a-boo. Gah.

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