I put semen-t in my vir-gina.

Back in 2001, The Hubs, who was then the fiancee, and I went to Vancouver, BC. I remember, when we got there, I was surprised that the people in Canada spoke just like us in the US.

I’m not sure what I expected, but perhaps a top hat and an Olde English Accent? But no…just a regular run of the mill accent. I mean, I know Canada is just like America…well, except for this whole “hippy peace” thing and those Canadian mounties…but I expected it to be different.

Anyway, today I was at the post office and I heard a word pronounced in a way that made me want to poop my pants right there.

The lady behind the counter said “February” like “Feb-rary.” Maybe I’m saying it wrong, but I pronounce the second month of the year like “Feb-U-ary.”

Yee-haw! We’re in Texas and we can’t say “February!” Giddyup!

The Hubs would be the first person to tell you that I don’t pronounce a lot of words correctly. Salmon? “Sal-mon.” Drives him up the wall. Cement? I say “SEmen-t”

He said he hates it when Jimmy Kimmel calls a vagina a “vir-gina.”

So, let’s open this up for Class Participation time. What word drives you nuts when it is mispronounced?

57 Responses to “I put semen-t in my vir-gina.”

  1. MollieBee
    January 25th, 2005 20:23

    Awww I’m jealous, I wanna go to Vancouver…I like hippie peace stuff.

    My husband bugs the shit out of me with his strange pronounciation. He can’t say a lot of things. I blame it on his Alaskan heritage.

  2. Wendi
    January 25th, 2005 20:27

    My husband and I go back and forth over the pronunciation of the word…AUNT. I pronounce it CORRECTLY…(with a LONG a sound ie: awwwwnt.) He pronounces it INCORRECTLY…(short a…..like the little black insect). I have tried to teach my kids to say it the correct way…he gives us all crap when we do….LOL! Therefore, the GIRLS in the house are cultured…(Me and my 15 yr. old daughter pronounce it correctly)….the GUYS in the house (Hubby and my 9 yr. old son…are wrong! LOL!) Oh, well, Guess, it’s a good lesson for the BOY…he might as well get used to be wrong NOW! YEP, I SAID IT! LOL!

  3. LX Robotnik
    January 25th, 2005 20:38

    Oh shit, here we go::

    Feb-yoo-ary drives me insane.
    People who say: anywaySSSS.
    Also “forte” should be pronounced “fort” (as in Ft. Lauderdale) NOT “fortay”
    Then there’s the ol’ “as per” Nah! Only “per” no “as”.
    And the Einsteins who say: “A myriad” No article. Myriad means “thousands.” You don’t say: a thousands.

    Dude, I’m telling you…I am the Strunk & White Nazi.

  4. Carmen
    January 25th, 2005 21:38

    I’m surprised no one has said “nu-kyu-lar.”
    “Please speak to the TA or myself” or “me and her wrote it” make me a little homicidal.

  5. y
    January 25th, 2005 21:45

    WASH .

  6. Mirella
    January 25th, 2005 21:52

    Say it with me, everyone (you too, President Bush):

    NUKE-lear. Not NUKE-u-lerr. Gawd. That one makes my skin crawl.

    My husband says “libary” instead of “library.” And “exspecially” instead of “especially.” Very annoying. Other pronounciations that drive me batshit crazy: “craan” instead of “cray-on,” “warsh” instead of “wash,” and “terrrists” instead of “terrorists.” There are more but I’ll stop there. I think I’ve already displayed an annoying level of pronounciation snobbery :)

  7. perl
    January 25th, 2005 21:57

    i hatehatehate when people say “runned” instead of “ruined.” And the other one that drives me *nuts* is when people say “vunnerable” instead of “vulnerable” - my husband does this and I’m gonna have to put the smack down soon if he doesn’t quit.

  8. Yecats
    January 25th, 2005 22:02

    I finally convinced my husband that it’s ‘bath’ and not ‘baf’.

    Next on the list ‘boot’, not ‘boont’.

  9. Mirella
    January 25th, 2005 22:15

    In addition to being a PRONUNCIATION (not pronounciation) snob, I am also a spelling bee champ!

    I knew “pronounciation” looked wrong. See what happens when I comment while watching Law and Order: SVU? I spell shit wrong.

  10. Ninotchka
    January 25th, 2005 22:17

    I know someone who says “viva” instead of “via” as in “Send it viva FedEx.”

    It drives me FUCKING INSANE. I mean, really, “viva”? What the fucking fuck?

  11. jamie
    January 25th, 2005 22:24

    frustrated, pronounced “fUS-trated” drives me batty.

  12. Lujza
    January 25th, 2005 22:31

    “garage”…when it’s pronounced “gay-rage”

    That was hilarious about Vancouver! We swear up here too… :)

  13. Cristin
    January 25th, 2005 22:34

    how about “pitcher” instead of picture? Axe instead of ask?

    you guys would all also love the book ‘Eats, shoots, and leaves.’

  14. Cindy
    January 25th, 2005 22:53

    I am annoyed by people who say KINDY GARDEN instead of KINDERGARTEN.
    Also, people who say “pitcher” instead of PICTURE.
    And then thare are those who say “real-a-tor” instead of realtor.
    I could go on and on…

  15. sarah
    January 25th, 2005 23:03

    Hello from Vancouver, home of hippie peace and gay marriage and ordinary accents.

    We are grammar and pronunciation snobs in our house, and messing with thouse things is very annoying.

    Some words we’re particular about are as follows: tomorrow is WeDnesday, next month is FebRuary, and because we’re Canadian, we have no nuCLEAR weapons.

  16. geozia
    January 25th, 2005 23:10

    When some people are looking at a map or arranging a room of furniture they want to know how something is “orientated”.

    Wash vs. “Warsh” !!!! Leash vs. “Lish”. Ask vs. “Axed”.

    and what about - You all, Ya’ll, Yall’s, Youse, Youns (east coast).

  17. Sarah
    January 25th, 2005 23:21

    I hate it…HATE it…when people say “Suposably” instead of “Supposedly” it drives me insaaaane!!!!

  18. Poppy
    January 25th, 2005 23:22

    My husband’s from the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, just across the river from Canada. I’m from the Ozarks. For six years we’ve been fighing about whether it’s pronounced “abowwwwwwwwwt” or “aboooooooot”. As in, “if you don’t say it right, I’m abowwwwwwwwwt to pop you in your big ol’ northern head.”

  19. debutaunt
    January 25th, 2005 23:25

    I am more of a grammar/word snob than pronunciation. Because I’m an editor, and I read all day.

    But I really hate it when people say, “Do you want to conversate?”

    Fuck yeah. Conversate away.

  20. Charla
    January 25th, 2005 23:43

    OMG, this is a big pet peeve of mine! I have a friend who says “vomic” instead of “vomit” and in-t-ways” instead of “anyway.”

    My husband drives me crazy when he pronounces “facade” as “fa-kade” and “carafe” as “kara-fay” even though I correct him EVERY TIME!

  21. Christine
    January 25th, 2005 23:55

    Oh, I’m so glad I’m not the only one. Many of the mispronunciations in this list drive me up a wall. But more then anything I want to pop my husband in the head when he says “Des Moinessss” and “Illinoisss.” I constantly tell him the “S” is silently and he doesn’t care. My mom lives in Des Moines and has corrected him and he just can’t stop. I have forbidden him to speak to me unless he says “at the place where your mother lives” or “in the state that your boss works in.” Men will never learn.

  22. Steph
    January 26th, 2005 00:11

    I don’t know if this pronunciation is incorrect or not, but it bugs me when my husband pronounces where we live as “You-ston” (dropping the H sound) instead of “Houston.”

    My sister-in-law and mother-in-law also have several that stick with me, although they’re funny when they say them:
    “That bugs me NO END” instead of “bugs me to no end!”
    “Milley-stronie” instead of Minestrone (minnie-stronie)

  23. collin
    January 26th, 2005 02:05

    Living in TX for a few yrs left me with a near-endless list of pronunciation quirks (and a drawl whenever I drink too much), but my all-time fave is insurance, pronounced IN-sherntz…

  24. Auty
    January 26th, 2005 02:32

    My husband is from a far away land called New Hampshire, my son and I have always lived in the midwest. SO my son and my husband fight over the proper pronounciation of words all the damn time.

    Because of this, I like to pronounce “assholes” in this fashion: “SHUT THE FUCK UPI’M TRYING TO WATCH TELEVISION!”

  25. Karyn
    January 26th, 2005 07:26

    You know what drives me completely batty…when I hear the word “herbs” pronounced (and that spelling is correct) “erbs”. Being from Australia, we pronounce the “H”, and we also leave all the vowels in our words.

    I also hatehatehate hearing “Secretary” spoken as “Sech-et-ary” which is quite common here.

    My skin crawls when I hear “probly” instead of “probably”, “rash-nl” instead of “ration-al”…oh god the list is too long.

    Spelling gets me…and sorry to say this, but the “American-isation” of spelling…traveller spelt traveler, councellor, counselor, colour, color, centre, center, litre, liter… etc you get the idea.

    As per is my biggest one, oh and “tad bit”…jesus, a tad is a bit, as is per…oh god I’m never going to be able to sleep now that I’ve started this….

  26. LX Robotnik
    January 26th, 2005 07:35

    SJ, go look at my newest entry. Now THAT’S the Daddy of Them All.

  27. Fish
    January 26th, 2005 09:20

    Melk, as opposed to Milk.

  28. Cristin
    January 26th, 2005 09:50

    …and let’s not forget my firmly still English husband, living here now for nearly 17 years, who still says:

    alu-min-ee-um for aluminum
    ar-KAN-zass for Arkansas
    Vitamin with the short ‘I’ sound
    “bah-nee” for that annoying puple dinosaur which my daughters finally got sick of, thankfully.
    and, sorry Karyn form Australia, here in America, it is decidely pronounced as “erbs” NOT herbs. My shusband stubbornly refuses to change. Gotta love his determination, but my children had very strange speech/pronunciation patterns before starting school.

  29. Jessica
    January 26th, 2005 10:08

    Mine…people who pronounce wolf “woof”, wash “warsh”, and my personal favorite frustrated “flustrated”. I have a co-worker who risks my head exploding every time she says that. What drives my husband nuts? (and probably a good share of other people on this planet) I pronounce creek “crick”. Now, I know how it’s supposed to sound. It’s just more fun to get his goat that way! (And I DID grow up saying it that way…)

  30. Em
    January 26th, 2005 10:20

    The hubs pronouces “Stewart” Stort. Any good Bostonian knows, it is pronouced Stew-it.

    I have few friends who will soon be celebrating Valentimes day. Alone.

  31. mimi
    January 26th, 2005 10:20

    How about calling a point “mute,” rather than “moot?”

  32. caitlin
    January 26th, 2005 10:29

    lol, my boyfriend and I have the same experience every time we go to this restaurant that has paper for tablecloths and a cup of crayons.

    I’ll say, “pass me the ‘crans’”

    he’ll get that exasperated look in his eyes and launch into the routine,

    “CRAY-ONS, caitlin, it’s CRAY-ONS, not CRANS!”

    “whatever. gimme a cran.”

    Eventually he’ll move onto listing all the other words I can’t pronounce, like “italian”. I say “eye-talian”, and he insists that it’s “ee-talian”.

    I may not be able to speak him under the table, but I do speak two more languages than he does, AND I could outspell him any day!

  33. megan
    January 26th, 2005 10:54

    the boyfriend has a few - but i must say i adore them all. the best one though is that he says, “curve” instead of curb - like “look out - your back wheel is going to go up on the curve” hee-hee. and he pluralizes all the words that weren’t meant to be - like reindeerS for example.
    oh, and pretty much anything “dubya” says is annoying…

  34. Charlotte
    January 26th, 2005 11:11

    I second (or third or whatever) “flustrated,” “warsh,” and “axe.” Also “murial” for mural, “thee-ater” for theater (or theatre, as you wish), “mirra” for mirror, “pilla” for pillow, “may-zure” for measure, the list could go on and on as I live in rural southeast Missouri. Some Brit/Australian pronuciations that bug me: “shedual” for schedule, “seketry” for secretary, “i-deer” for idea. “aboot” for about gets me, too.

    I always thought forte was properly pronouced “fortay”??? I studied French too long…

    Great topic!

  35. LX Robotnik
    January 26th, 2005 11:14

    P.S. I meant my Tuesday entry. Sorry, put another up since I made my comment.

  36. sadie
    January 26th, 2005 11:53

    I can’t stand how french words get americanised, chaise longue is not pronounced chayz lownj it’s shez longg and enroute is not en-rowt it’s on-root

  37. shaunacat
    January 26th, 2005 11:55

    My husband has a phrase that he says often, that makes totally no sense if you analyze it. He’ll start a sentence with “Just to go to say…blahblahblah.” He uses it as a segway like you would use the phrase “For example in this case…blahblhablah”. I think it’s cuter than hell, but it would drive me nuts if it were anyone else.

    Oh and I’m Texan and it is physically impossible for me to NOT say “Ya’ll” or the plural “all ya’ll”. It’s ingrained in us, people.

  38. Dianna
    January 26th, 2005 12:54

    Two of my “favorites” are owinge for orange and feesh for fish.

  39. Amanda
    January 26th, 2005 13:33

    Li-BAR-ee makes me want to stick a fork in my eye. It’s li-bBRA-ree.

  40. jenny
    January 26th, 2005 13:51

    Thank you Karyn and Sadie! Being a Canadian spelling snob I too hate both lazy spelling (donut = doughnut???) and the mis-pronunciation of foreign words (EXpresso? no, it’s ESpresso, just like it’s spelled). “Our” pronounced “are” instead of “hour”, and “jewellery” pronounced as “joolry” instead of “”jewel-ery” (surprise - it’s exactly like it looks when it’s PROPERLY spelled!) also bug me. It’s called phonics, people - look into it.

  41. Crystal
    January 26th, 2005 15:37

    Water is wooder where I grew up. Ugh… tacky! My hubs says Ex-presso, like Jenny mentioned. No Dammit! it’s Espresso!!! As a matter of fact a lot of the above mentioned words drive me crazy.

  42. Jessica
    January 26th, 2005 15:49

    birtday with no “h” drives me bananas. So does batt-ry instead of batt-e-ry. Irregardless is another winner…

  43. kasually
    January 26th, 2005 15:58

    My grandmother says “srimp” instead of “shrimp”. Ugh.

  44. brilly
    January 26th, 2005 16:29

    Karyn, you forgot to say that you live in Australia, not ’stray-ya. I also have a friend who pronounces cordial as cord-ig-al.
    One thing that really peeves me is when TV presenters say ” Welcome back” I didn’t go anywhere you morons.

  45. Jilly
    January 26th, 2005 16:48

    My hubs says youse. A lot. Even when he is trying to sound really important, deep telephone voice. He’ll say, “Ah, Yes Sir, Do youse take reservations?” Substitute reservations for whatever other thing he possible could be asking about. Every phone call begins the same way, “Ah, Yes Sir, Do youse”. At least it’s not youns. That’s his Nana. I never heard that before. When she said youns for the first time I just stared at her with the Rock’s eye. I had no friggin’ clue what she meant.

  46. Angie
    January 26th, 2005 17:20

    I used to work for a company that included the word LABORATORIES. I would hear fellow employees - once even a manager pronounce it LAB-A-TORY. Grrrr…

    My husband and I disagree about the roof. As it the top of a building. I say rOOf, with long Os. What he says sounds more like the sound a dog makes.

  47. GranolaSpice
    January 26th, 2005 17:32

    when people say “prolly” instead of probably, I want to cut them.

  48. GranolaSpice
    January 26th, 2005 17:34

    also? i grew up in Washington State, and when people say “worshington” i must be escorted off the premises.

  49. Karen
    January 26th, 2005 17:54

    The word is asked. It should NEVER be pronounced as “axed”!

  50. melissa
    January 26th, 2005 18:37

    Brits don’t pronounce about as aboot and secretary as seketry,
    and we did make up the language so we’re probably correct on all the others…..

  51. Mia
    January 26th, 2005 20:23

    Being in vet school, it is hard to keep a straight face when a cattle producer talks about a cow’s *tit*s over and over. It’s TEATS, people, TEATS!
    Oh, and I have a British professor who can’t decide which country he wants to be from. He says ske-lee-tal instead of skeletal and va-giii-nal (long I) instead of the right way.
    One more– my husbands from Pennsylvania and he wears tenner shoes (while I and the rest of the planet wear tennis shoes).

  52. Stacey
    January 27th, 2005 00:03

    As another Canadian, from Vancouver no less…… what drives me freaky-nuts is when the word FOYER is pronounced “foy-errrr’ instead of “foy-ay”.


  53. Mandy
    January 27th, 2005 08:10

    Everything that I would add to the list is there already. I have to say, though, that this is a fun blog to read. I just found it with the help of a friend and can’t wait to read more!

  54. tabitha
    January 27th, 2005 11:33

    What a topic to get everyone riled up!
    But I have one that no one else could touch. My aunt mispronounces every word she possibly can and the one that drives me the craziest is that state west of here where Denver is, you know Cahdorahdah.

  55. AyEnDeeAreEeAyAitch
    January 27th, 2005 15:46

    People who pronounce Theater THEE-ATE-ER. No dipshit, it’s THEETER, Same for turn signal. My husband insist on saying SINGLE, instead of SIGNAL. Also when people say treasure like TRAYZHUR instead of TRE SHUR.

  56. Kristin
    January 31st, 2005 17:22

    My in-laws mispronounce practically every word they say. I’m Southern and don’t mind many of our local mispronunciations. But the in-laws take it to a new level of backwoods.

    For example:
    syrup = sups
    milk = myeelk (it’s hard to describe, but it’s a nasal, puky sound that makes you never want to drink milk again)
    “He grew up” becomes either “He growed up,” “He grewed up,” or “He was raised up.”

    Unfortunately, my wonderful DH picked up many of these horrible grammar & pronunciation “quirks” (that’s putting it kindly) from his parents. He says “supposably” and “libary” … and worst of all, he always uses “seen” instead of “saw.” As in, “I seen a big buck over yunder in the green field.”

    I have been trying to train him out of this, but lifelong speech habits die hard.

    Another thing, he can’t seem to grasp that in Spanish, “ll” is pronounced like “y.” As in tort-ee-ya. The poor thing pronounces it tor-till-ya. Same for quesa-dill-ya and pico de gall-yo. So embarassing.

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