Foodie by Association

A pot of boiled tomatoes is sitting in my kitchen.

Now that Ellie eats actual “food” (that word, we’ll leave in quotations because what she eat surely doesn’t resemble anything I would find palatable), we find ourselves in a Brave New World, a world where we play the game “I wonder if she’ll eat this?”

Back when Ellie was itty bitty, we got into the habit of not bathing her often. The entire act of bathing was a nuisance, with the wiping and the shampooing and the drying and the dressing. We were known to let her go many, many days without a bath due to one reason: pure and simple exhaustion.

At one point, my family said that my child smelled like a teenage boy’s foot.

Point taken. Okay?

So I think it comes as a surprise to many that we are making Ellie’s food. As in Yours Truly goes to the grocery store, picks out a vegetable, and brings it home for my child to throw around. It’s like “Did you hear SJ is making Ellie’s food? Our SJ. The SJ who went an entire year in sixth grade without washing her hair! She’s making baby food!”

Besides saving money, I enjoy the actual act of choosing the vegetables. I walk around the produce department, examining items such as kale and beets, wondering what might my child might enjoy digesting.

Wow! Look at me! I’m considering feeding my baby kale! I don’t know what in the hell kale is, but I bet she’d like it! She likes oranges! She’ll LOVE kale!

I like to call myself a foodie by association.

I have very simple tastes. Give me a pizza and some ice cream and I’m ready to go. Hell, give me a spinach leaf salad and I’ll eat it. I’m pretty simple. So the fact that I’m choosing which fancy vegetables she should eat makes me feel extravagant.

You know, if you drove around in a Mercedes and wore diamonds, even if they were borrowed, you might feel rich? Or if you’re always hanging around with that slutty friend who has done it up the butt so many times that her proctologist shakes his head in belief that you start to feel a little loose?

Same with the food. My baby eats carrots! I’m eating them by association! I think The Hubs has predicted my foodie by association complex and made a rule that I couldn’t feed her anything I wouldn’t eat.

If that is the case, she’ll be doomed to a life full of cookies and brownies. But she doesn’t know any better yet and The Hubs isn’t the one picking out the vegetables. So, that being said, even if I don’t know how to cook an asparagus, I have some boiling water and a food processor.

It might end up tasting like ass, but it is home made ass, damnit.

20 Responses to “Foodie by Association”

  1. Jessica
    January 23rd, 2005 21:35

    And it’s probably more nutritious than what comes in the baby food jars, although even I will eat the bananas with tapioca. :-D .

    By the way, I’m still pregnant. Labor induction may be soon.

  2. brilly
    January 23rd, 2005 22:06

    We used to steam different vegies then freeze them in ice cube trays. My poor kids all ate lambs brains when they were little. They loved them but I used to heave the whole time I was cooking them.

  3. girl
    January 23rd, 2005 22:24

    I made all my girls’ baby food too. It is really easy to do and so much cheaper, not to mention more nutritious. I used to make it in bulk then freeze it in meal-sized portions in ice cube trays. The book Super Baby Food is really helpful, too. I’m glad I’m not the only one to do it!

  4. muppet
    January 23rd, 2005 22:39

    Ellie and her fine taste can assist you in adding a baby food line to your baking business. :)

  5. Badger
    January 23rd, 2005 22:46

    Dude, don’t boil the asparagus! Roast it in the oven and then mush it if she can’t handle chunks yet. Your child will thank you, and will grow up knowing how asparagus is supposed to taste.

  6. Wendi
    January 23rd, 2005 23:13

    Just remember…if her diapers smell funny…don’t freak out that she has some weird “crotch rot”….asparagus can make your pee smell STRANGE…so be prepared!!!

  7. Poppy
    January 23rd, 2005 23:20

    My kiddo has had a whopping 6 jars of baby food in her entire 11-month life. The homemade babyfood thing is a blast! She started eating solids in the summer, so she got lots of good stuff from my mom’s garden and the farmer’s market. Clara Jane will eat damn near anything. Lebenese food is her favorite.

  8. Auty
    January 24th, 2005 01:01

    Working at home taking care of your daughter and yourself and your husband…it pays. You are increasing your vegetable knowledge, and you’re daughter will have an adventurous pallet. Too bad there is no tax deduction for time mothers spend choosing food for their kids. It’s work. :)

  9. chris
    January 24th, 2005 08:41

    none of our home grown four had baby food-it was just the $5 food grinder from sears and whatever was on the table. (no clue about the romaniac since he was 6 when he came home, but tough to imagine that gerber was a biggie in the orphanage.) they all manage! chris

  10. Veronica
    January 24th, 2005 09:40

    The one that always killed me was bananas. Why would someone buy cooked, canned bananas? Throw a banana in the diaper bag and bring a spoon. They’re easy to mash and don’t even have to be refrigerated. Have babyfood; will travel.

  11. Sarcomical
    January 24th, 2005 11:47

    yay for you! you are so ambitious. hey, anything that’s really colorful is probably good for her. heh-heh. vegetable-wise, not cookie-wise.

  12. Michele
    January 24th, 2005 12:30

    Just stopping by to say hello. Yesterday, I asked a few of my readers to suggest a blog that they think should be be the site of the day and deserves to be discovered simply because it is wonderful. Muppet suggested your site and I can certainly see why.

    Now you do not mind if I look around a bit……

  13. LX Robotnik
    January 24th, 2005 12:46

    G has been on the “solids” for about 2 weeks. Loves ‘em. MOre than breastmilk. Eats like a horse. Is on the fence when it comes to sweet potatoes though.

    Good luck.
    Diapers are gonna smell/look different. Fo’ real!

  14. debutaunt
    January 24th, 2005 13:05

    My kid ate the heck out of some refried beans. We usually just mushed up whatever it was that we were cooking. That was back in the day when I actually used a stove.

    And almost always it was organic. I fed her organics until she was 14 months old and attended daycare. So glad I did that just so that she could go there and eat the other kids cheetos and pop tarts. She still eats broccoli and carrots at age 4, so I don’t feel that bad.

  15. Kalena Mango
    January 24th, 2005 14:09

    My mom just ground up everything she ate for me to eat. So I ate a lot of ground Taco-Bell-Bean-Burritos-With-Green-Sauce when I was a baby. She says it’s because they were poor, but I know it’s because they’re deeee-licious! :)

  16. Texas T-bone
    January 24th, 2005 16:06

    Kiddos apparently (according to a highly scientific report at dinner tables everywhere) get their eating habits from their fathers. Or I’ve also heard they get it from their opposite-sex parent (in Ellie’s case, your husband). Maybe you shouldn’t feed her anything he won’t eat, or he needs to learn how to eat everything.

  17. Antonia
    January 24th, 2005 16:25

    If you’re in a bit of a hurry and can’t wait for water to boil and then cook and steam the food, the microwave actually does a great job. I frequently take a potato and two carrots, or brocolli or something, cut it all up into little pieces, in some tupperware with very little water (1/4 inch or so) and turn it on for about 6 minutes. There’s not enough water to boil all the nutrients out, and while you wait for the DING you can get 6 minutes worth of stuff done. If you check the ingredients on the baby food jars, you will be glad you’re doing it this way. They actually add sugar to many of the fruit deserts. I do usually have a couple vegetable jars around for on the run stuff, or really bad days when normally I wouldn’t even have crawled out of bed.

  18. LX Robotnik
    January 24th, 2005 20:18

    Texas T-Bone may be on to something. My daughter watches every bite I take, of everything I eat. Always. Never her mom.

  19. Ida
    January 25th, 2005 11:54

    Check out the book “Feed Me I’m Yours.” It’s cheap- like $8, very useful! My mom used it, I use it, and I always give it as a baby gift- it’s wonderful.

  20. rules of backgammon
    April 4th, 2005 22:35

    rules of backgammon
    Hell is other people! by free download backgammon

  • Etc.

    • www.flickr.com