An Entire Post About Boobies…

I am watching “The View” on television as I wait for my early lunch of noodles to get ready and The Boob Nazi was on television, explaining breastfeeding.

If there is nothing that can make women feel guilty, it is the topic of breastfeeding.

I remember, back in April that I went to a breastfeeding class sponsored by Duke University Hospital. And I was scared shitless. (Note: I’m very bad at linking in my own blog. Hopefully you can read it.)

I Did Not Want To Do It. But I did. And it wasn’t as horrible as I expected it. I got used to it.

BUT BUT BUT BUT sometimes, breastfeeding doesn’t work for women. For whatever reasons– maybe it is YOU, maybe it is the milk or the baby or whatnot but you decide to do the formula route. Just because you do formula doesn’t make you EVIL.

I was exclusively formula fed. And I don’t have allergies. The Hubs was boob fed. And he has ALLERGIES! The horror!

I am in awe of the women who do boob exclusively, without pumping. You must be magical. Your boobs have special powers. You should put them on display at the State Fair and have your titties bake lemon pound cake for everyone, just so they can see how special they are.


But for the rest of us who also pump and do formula, well, we are special, too. Perhaps we will be Special Ed and have to ride the short bus and our kids will have to wear helmets out in public because formula has entered their little bodies, but they are special too.

And I’m sure that if my boobs went to the State Fair, they could whip up some Betty Crocker brownies.

So be nice to your boobies. Be nice to your baby. If your baby is hungry, feed it. If it involves formula, then so it be. If it involves boobies, so it be.

And don’t blame formula on my child having a cold or acid reflux. Why? Because my kiddo is happy, healthy and chubby. Those cheeks don’t lie.

15 Responses to “An Entire Post About Boobies…”

  1. jamie
    November 30th, 2004 13:32

    you go girl!! i had trouble breastfeeding my son (child #2) and i spiraled into a pretty bad case of post-partum depression because of it… it was finally when a nurse said to me that a little formula was not going to hurt my baby and gave him some that he actually figured out if he sucked on this nipple thing, then his tummy got full!!

    breast feeding nazis give breastfeeding a bad name. and, like we as parents need any more guilt on our heads!

    kudos to you for having the staying power to pump and feed your baby… i’d have given up long ago!

    ((((((((sorry about the long rambliness of this comment!! you got me on my high horse there!))))))))))))))))))

  2. Em
    November 30th, 2004 13:34

    Well, yeah! I am a postpartum nurse and before I give moms my spiel I have to peek out the door and up and down the hallway. I tell them how, if you want to breastfeed but you want to quit, you can give a bottle and still breastfeed tomorrow. Hell, you can give one every night. But we are a “baby-friendly hospital” which, evidently isn’t compatible with being mom friendly so I give my advice under the guise of Deep Throat and in the cover of darkness. God forbid someone have ALL the information!

    I hate breast nazis. Like you need more to feel guilty about as a new mom.

  3. Leslie
    November 30th, 2004 14:08

    You’re so right. I had to stop breastfeeding after a week and a half (complications, ect etc. long drama story) Anyway, TO THIS DAY I feel horrible pains of guilt when people ask if I bfeed. “NO.” I feel I have to explain WHY I don’t. But it’s non of their business.

    Still, though, when I get out the bottle of formula, I swear people say things under their breath. Or, perhaps, I’m just that paranoid. :-)

  4. Corrie
    November 30th, 2004 14:20

    I think people who do both (pumping and sucking the life right out of you) are even more special because they do double the work.

    I did both with my second child and it wasn’t until I weaned the little porker at 9 months did I truly begin to feel awake and aware. I was pooped for nine months…not to mention being pregnant for nine months. Holy Crap! I was tired for a long time.

    I hate boobie nazis.


  5. Robotnik
    November 30th, 2004 14:24

    I know I’m a male speaking here and may not have much credibility, but…also, a lot of women develop multiple breast infections or yeast infections and cannot breastfeed their babies. Moms, of all people, ought to realize that about other moms.

  6. Stacey
    November 30th, 2004 15:03

    YAY! I’m magical!


  7. Stacey
    November 30th, 2004 15:05

    And Robotnik, you can still give the ol’ boob juice when you have a yeast infection.

    My baby is the thrush master, we like to spread it back and forth to each other. :p

  8. James
    November 30th, 2004 15:32

    This was the greatest post ever: Be Nice to Boobies!
    I live by that motto. And, if anyone ever mistreats your boobs, you make damn sure to let me know and I’ll handle them (the mistreaters, not your boobs … unless you say otherwise, but that’s a whole ‘nother post altogether).

  9. Jessica
    November 30th, 2004 19:08

    I plan on breastfeeding exclusively, but if it doesn’t work out, so be it. I’m not going to agonize over what is better. I mainly want to breastfeed because it’s cheaper and WIC doesn’t cover formula forever.

  10. Mari
    December 1st, 2004 00:19

    thank you for that. I often feel like a loser because I never bfed my three kids. But they are all happy healthy and smart. And the latest little newbie, well he is the biggest chunkamonka of them all, and he is happy and bouncy.

    I sometimes feel bad, because I never tried to “push” myself into it more. But then I sit back and I see how bouncy and happy they are, and I know it’s ok.

  11. frozenmojo
    December 1st, 2004 07:30

    i have to give my 3-week old supplemental formula to help with my b/feeding because she wasn’t gaining any weight. Initially, i was nervous to try because of all the “stuff” you hear, but so far it’s been great. she seems more content, hasn’t developed any nipple confusion and i have the comfort of knowing that she’s getting plenty of nourishment.

    i really don’t understand why there is so much controversy and angst when it comes to the subject of b/feeding - can’t we just all get along?

  12. Texas T-bone
    December 1st, 2004 18:13

    Yeah! Do what you can to feed that kid! That’s the important thing. Telling a tale out of school here: my wife has inverted nips and needed a guard to make breastfeeding work. She went through that for 8 months or so, then started supplementing with formula. The Cutlet is happy, healthy and the cutest (boy) kid in the world.

  13. Nicole
    December 1st, 2004 19:23

    Hey Jes - WIC does actually covers formula forever - until the baby is 1 and then the kids go to whole milk until 2. Yes - you women like Stacey are incredible - no pumping at all? Amazing! That is alot of tit time!

  14. Stacey
    December 2nd, 2004 10:18

    She’s a boob gal Nicole.

    This may cause problems when she’s older. heh.

  15. Stacey
    December 2nd, 2004 10:18

    She’s a breast gal Nicole.

    This may cause problems when she’s older. heh.

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