Beware of the Rubber Band man!

I’m still bathing. Yes, you read that right. I always heard how “new moms” “never could find the time to bathe” and I thought that was plain out wrong. I mean, not bathing, to me, is on the same level as genocide and nuclear war.

A girl has gotta bathe.

So when my little Bear came along, I insisted that I would bathe. And I have, every single damn day. Sometimes I bathe with a little Furby sitting screaming in her car seat on the floor while I feverishly try to wash my pits and crotch because a clean mama is a Godly mama and a Godly mama doesn’t leave her kid asleep on her belly on the couch so she can go and send some emails.

No, I’d never do that.

I’ve somehow managed to even leave the house on several occassions. One involved driving across Houston to go see my husband. The other involved a grocery store. With a baby. All by myself. In 98 degree heat and 108 heat indexes with a little Furby who sweats like a MoFo.

I even made dinner tonight. Okay, so it was Mac and Cheese and I let the noodles cook for approximately 5,783 minutes while I tried to pull my tit out of the baby’s mouth (ha! forget that one!) so by the time I got to the noodles, they were roughly the consistency of my child’s crap.

Nice and runny and not edible.

I ended up eating a sandwich. The hubs, who eats ANYTHING, actually threw them away. They were that bad.

I decided to go and buy myself a sling so I can carry my baby around. I’ve known people who have used these and they were pretty cool. I’m very excited about getting my Furby Carrier so I can hold her while I do my Sit and Be Fit.

Don’t knock it until you try it. (FYI, Before pregnancy, I could run 6 miles of hills.)

I’ll be happy when we get this whole Baby/Mama thing down pat so I can get back to my Regulary Scheduled Programming, which also involves this site. So while my posting may be erratic, be happy in the fact that my child mostly sleeps through the night and is now up to 9 pounds, 8.5 ounces and 22 inches long.

Basically, to sustain that type of growth, that’s a lot of time with my boob out.

5 Responses to “Beware of the Rubber Band man!”

  1. Texas T-bone
    August 3rd, 2004 00:53

    Sounds like you’re handling things just fine! Make your husband do the cooking and continue to bathe. You’ll get the hang of taking your wee one out the more you do it; we also made it a point to take ours to restaurants to help teach him how to behave. He’s 19 months old and has better table manners than my grandparents.

    Hang in there, Sarcastic Momma!

  2. pink lotus
    August 3rd, 2004 16:39

    You’re in Houston? Husband’s family is there. Maybe we’ll end up meeting someday. :) (Not to be a stalker or anything.)

    How much exercising did you do while you were pregnant? I’m trying to keep active still, but I run much slower and for shorter distances than I used to. I’m afraid of letting my muscles atrophy so that it’s a million times more difficult to start exercising again once I pop the being out.

    Isn’t it amazing that the only thing that’s making Ellie grow is what’s coming out of your body?

    I’m trying to teach my husband how to cook now so that he can help out more later. His ADD kicks in, and it ends up being more of a hassle telling him how to make the food than if I did it myself. If I could stand being near the cooking meat. Can your husband cook so that you can feed the baby? He could’ve at least made you the sandwich. Mine goes out for burritos for us.

  3. THE SJ
    August 3rd, 2004 17:16

    the hubs is usually the chef…but I’M TRYING to be more of a help. he did make the sandwich :) the hubs actually does most of everything…but he also wakes up at 630 so he can drive an hour to work, so i’m trying not to be a totally ungrateful slob!!!

  4. jenB
    August 5th, 2004 01:45

    I think you are doing fabulously.

  5. backgammon
    April 4th, 2005 22:12

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